Wednesday, April 13, 2005

Funny or disloyal?

Several months ago a mutual friend of a friend and I were talking about laundry. He had just retired and was complaining about having to do the laundry. I told him I wasn't doing much better and had a pile of laundry in the basement I needed to do. He then told me he was getting really good at doing the laundry and he'd be willing to do my laundry, too. Not being a fan of laundry I asked him his price? A blow job for every load of laundry.

Not money? I asked.

Naw. A load for a load.

Thinking I was getting off cheap, I said sure and we laughed. Every time laundry was mentioned he offered his services and promised to be right over. He lives about eight hours from here.

A few weeks after that in a conversation with the friend I told her about the deal and how funny the guy I was seeing thought it was. Must be a guy thing. She was very upset and said that I was disloyal and undermining her relationship with her fella. She said she forgave me then but she keeps bringing it up. In fact, she is bringing it up again today. She says I should never have offered him a blow job to do my laundry and that if I was a true friend I wouldn't even discuss those things with her fella.

She also told me that she related the story of how I offered a blow job to her fella to her friends and they agreed that she was right and I was no true friend, to watch her back, and not to trust me. She has known me for ten years and she has complained many times that I am too honest, that I lack tact, and that I always have to be right. Let's forget that she is of course right and I am a no good, low down, boyfriend stealing bitch who goes around offering blow jobs to my friends' fellas at every possible opportunity. Let's not forget that in group chats between her fella, mine, she and I we have thrown around a lot of double entendre and sexual content with joyful abandon.

I have apologized for the incident so many times I've lost count.

My point is this, if I had any intentions of making good on the load for a load offer, I would never have mentioned it to her. I have this nasty habit of saying what I think and being completely honest. For this I have been branded aggressive, tactless, rude, and abrasive. I maintain that there is never a bad time to tell the truth and be completely honest and that it isn't something you need a spin doctor for.

If I'm wrong, I'll admit it, but was I disloyal or was it just a harmless joke between friends? You decide.

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